Archive for the '80s hair styles' Category

Feelin’ Kinda Patton (CD)

Feelin' Kinda Patton (CD)

POP CD – “America is like a giant retarded trust fund kid”; “I was late to an ether frolic”; “Angie Dickinson could suck…” well, that last line’s better left for Patton Oswalt himself to finish. Let’s back up. An acerbically funny standup and underrated comedic actor, Oswalt finally gets his own album with Feelin’ Kinda Patton, and there’s a good chance Wal-Mart isn’t stocking it. Speaking too quickly for your kidneys to process the laugh pain, Oswalt puts a pincer through the strata of American society, skewering everyone from the President and his curious motives, to decadent Hollywood producer Robert Evans, to gumpy Midwestern Fashion Bug workers navely laying ‘80s pop/soap opera discard Michael Damian behind the Tilt-A-Whirl. “That’s the one thing I like about George Bush”, he says in “Come On Apocalypse.” “I really think he can get us into the Apocalypse.” But while the Prez definitely raises Oswalt’s hackles, his Bush bit only sets up a description of why it’d be so great to buy the farm during such an event. As he says, it’s a better way to go than getting eaten by fire ants, right? There’s a bit of David Cross in Oswalt’s style, mostly in how effectively both use the F-word, but also in their common ability to weave hilarious cynicism through a jumble of personal experience and mundane pop culture events. But Feelin’ Kinda Patton really gets going whenever Oswalt vaults off the usual comic fodder — ‘80s hair metal, porn, hippies — into bizarre flights of disposable culture surrealism. His recollection of an old Asti Spumante ad becomes an invitation into the twisted sex life of a frustrated midlevel professional; Robert Evans is the anchor for a meta-analysis of 1970s Hollywood Babylon. Not everyone’s gonna get it. But for those who do, it’s at least as funny as King of Queens. – Feelin’ Kinda Patton (CD)

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Danava (CD)

Danava (CD)

Neo-Prog CD – Although the logo on Danava’s self-titled EP may resemble that of a death metal group (where the band’s name is almost impossible to decipher), the music is nothing like Morbid Angel. The Portland, OR quartet (for the record, their name is pronounced “Don-Uh-Vuh”) specializes in a sound that is hard to pin down to a single genre, as they somehow manage to touch upon metal, prog, and glam (cool ’70s glam, not godawful ‘80s glam) all at the same time. In fact, as evidenced by such tracks as “Quiet Babies Astray in a Manger” and “By the Mask,” the band somehow manage to touch upon all three styles in the span of a single song. And keeping in line with their retro sound/approach, the group also dresses the part — early-’70s hair styles and threads (judging by the band shot inside the CD case). – Danava (CD)

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Junkyard (CD)

Junkyard (CD)

Musical CD – Comprised of ex-Dag Nasty/Minor Threat and future Bad Religion guitarist Brian Baker, Junkyard’s 1989 debut is a rollicking, good time, if somewhat disjointed, affair. Produced by veteran classic rock knobster Tom Werman, the band’s self-titled debut puts a different spin on the late-’80s hair rock mantra. Dirtier and certainly blusier than most of its counterparts, Junkyard incorporated elements of Southern rock, boogie-woogie, and AC/DCism into one compact sound. Songs like “Simple Man,” replete with saloon-style piano, make a valid argument for a good idea seen through with lackluster execution. The album’s single “Hollywood” sounds like Faster Pussycat playing through Lynyrd Skynyrd’s guitar rig. If you like Rhino Bucket or the Sea Hags of this world, Junkyard’s debut is worth checking out. – Junkyard (CD)

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Holy Hell (CD)

Holy Hell (CD)

Musical CD – Originality can be a beautiful thing. It’s hard not to feel excited when you remember the first time you heard someone as fresh-sounding and boldly original as Radiohead, De La Soul, Nirvana, John Coltrane, or Nellie McKay. That said, anyone who insists on originality and innovation from every artist who comes along — a highly unrealistic expectation — is cutting himself off from a lot of worthwhile albums. There are some releases that aren’t the least bit original but still deserve credit for quality, inspiration, and craftsmanship. A case in point is Holy Hell, which merits a favorable response regardless of the fact that Rob Rock is totally derivative. The main focus of this album is ’70s/’80s-style power metal, an approach that — like hair band pop-metal — has sounded very dated since the Nirvana/Pearl Jam/grunge upheaval of the early ’90s. But even though power metal has been flying under the radar for a long time, it has maintained an enthusiastic cult following. Although released in 2005, this solo effort from singer Rob Rock (formerly of Impellitteri) sounds like it could have been recorded 20 or 25 years earlier. There isn’t a trace of alternative metal, death metal/black metal, or metalcore to be found on Holy Hell; this hard-driving yet melodic effort is firmly planted in the old-school aesthetic of Judas Priest, Iron Maiden, Ronnie James Dio, and Queensrche — at least musically. One thing that separates Rock from those artists is the fact that “Lion of Judah,” “Calling Angels,” and other songs on Holy Hell are coming from a Christian perspective. But Rock isn’t preachy or annoying about his religion, and many of the metal websites that reviewed Holy Hell didn’t seem to pick up on the Christian leanings of this album — which underscores the fact that metal doesn’t have to be groundbreaking to be worthwhile and enjoyable. – Holy Hell (CD)

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Mystica (CD)

Mystica (CD)

Musical CD – Yet another album by German guitar superstar Axel Rudi Pell, Mystica delivers…well, pretty much what every previous Axel Rudi Pell album has delivered. Pell is comfortable enough with his impressive chops that he doesn’t have to do the whole God of the Fretboard routine that so many European metal guitarists are saddled with, so his albums are refreshingly light on the pyrotechnics. He does have a fondness for the pretentiously titled instrumental, however, so here listeners have “Haunted Castle Serenade (Opus #4 Grazioso e Aggresso)” and “The Mysterious Return (Intro).” Otherwise, this is utterly straightforward, by the book melodic hard rock in the ‘80s poodle-hair style, complete with former Hardline singer Johnny Gioeli’s pleasant but utterly anonymous vocals. If you still treasure your Scorpions and Rainbow albums, Mystica is sure to please, but those whose taste in metal has progressed beyond 1987 might find this unapologetically old-school stuff too retro for their tastes. Stewart Mason, All Music Guide – Mystica (CD)

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The Evil (CD)

The Evil (CD)

Rock CD – Diamond Rexx’s reunion was among the more unlikely reunions of the early 2000s — after all, ‘80s-style hair bands went out of vogue when Nirvana, Pearl Jam, and their grunge colleagues exploded commercially in 1992 and 1993. Plus, Diamond Rexx was never a huge name in heavy metal/hard rock; the Chicago band only had a small following. So how great would the demand for new albums be? Despite all that, the Windy City headbangers are surprisingly inspired on their post-reunion CD The Evil, which unites lead singer/head honcho Nasti Habits with newcomers S.S. (guitar), Tommy Hanus (bass), and Billy Nychay (drums). This 2002 release isn’t outstanding, but it’s decent — and the disc isn’t nearly as ‘80s-sounding as some might expect. While Alice Cooper remains an influence, Rexx updates their sound and makes a lot of alternative metal moves. Instead of sounding like a tribute to ‘80s hair bands, The Evil often gives the impression that Habits has been listening to a lot of Pantera, Soundgarden, and post-’80s Metallica. Habits doesn’t sound like he has forgotten about the ‘80s altogether; “Rainy Daze,” for example, is a power ballad that wouldn’t have been out of place on a Whitesnake or Bon Jovi album back in 1985. But more often than not, Diamond Rexx manages to avoid sounding dated. Between the two producers (who include Gary Loizzo and former Red Light Records president Mark Nawara) and the new lineup, Habits usually sends out a message that he isn’t stuck in the past. Some die-hard hair band enthusiasts will no doubt yearn for the old Diamond Rexx; however, those who are open to more modern alterna-metal will find The Evil to be a generally satisfying, if imperfect, outing. – The Evil (CD)

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Murder Mystery Game: The Totally Tubular ’80s Mystery – Instant Download

Murder Mystery Game: The Totally Tubular '80s Mystery - Instant Download

Fer sure! This ‘80s murder mystery party is an entertaining and comical evening for 8-12 players. So gather your best ‘80s outfit and get ready to jump into the role of a fun ‘80s character while sleuthing a hilarious mystery…’80s style! Oh my gosh, like, gag me with a spoon! Like, this is the most radical murder mystery party you will ever host! Your friends will, like, think you are so totally tubular if you, like, invite them to this hilarious ‘80s murder mystery party. But like, totally beware of the farting ghost catcher! NEED MORE CHARACTERS? Now available: this game has a 5 character (5 female) expansion pack! Click here! We also offer a murder mystery prop kit for this murder mystery party including a Rubik’s cube for the host character, a bent spoon with the appropriate evidence on it, 25ft of Crime Scene Do Not Cross Tape , and white face makeup for the victim – CLICK HERE This is the instant download version of the game. The Murder Mystery Party Kit that you can instantly download for this game includes the following items: Murder Mystery Party Host instructions – general and specific for each round Guest instructions A character list with descriptions and costume suggestions 3 rounds of game play – clue cards for each character for each round Name tags for each character Murder Mystery Dinner Menu Suggestions Required as well as optional activities (games) for each round including: Ice-breaking ‘80s Trivia Questions A Totally Tubular ‘80s Dance Contest The Totally Awesome ‘80s Movie Challenge Gag me with Charades Challenge ‘80s Music Lyric Challenge ***ALL OF THIS IN ADDITION TO THE MYSTERY!*** SYNOPSIS: The totally radical CEO of Baqua Net Hairspray was an outrageous scientist by the name of Ivan Pingmold. His tubular wife, Polly Pingmold, was a recovering social outcast and recent lawsuit winner. Polly hosted a celebratory dinner for her husband’s benefit concert – 'Hair Aid.' 'Hair Aid' was a radical musical concert that raised

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Road House at Barnes and Noble

Road House at Barnes and Noble

Action – general DVD – History may relegate Patrick Swayze to the dust heap of Hollywood has-beens; but with his lead turn in Rowdy Herringtons Road House, he stakes his claim to cinematic immortality. Swayze, clad in cowboy boots and skin-tight jeans, is Dalton, a former New York University philosophy student and martial arts expert who (we kid you not) works as a “cooler” (head bouncer) at a rough-and-tumble honky-tonk in Jasper, Missouri. This place is so tough that the house band (led by blind blues guitarist Jeff Healey) plays in a cage to protect them from flying bottles and hurled bodies. None of this fazes Dalton, who manages to: keep the unruly rednecks in line without mussing a strand of his blow-dried hair; clean up the town, which is under the thumb of a wealthy thug (Ben Gazzara); and get down with a hot blonde doctor (Kelly Lynch). Along the way he dodges monster trucks and mouths lines like “Pain dont hurt” while stitching up his own wounds, Terminator-style. Is this schizophrenic mishmash of westerns, gangster films, and kung fu movies ludicrous? Completely, and thats what makes Road House so much fun. Swayze, taking the role of soulful hunk to heart, plays the whole thing utterly straight: Hes the ultimate strong-silent screen archetype of the Reagan 80s. Bad movies just dont get any better than this. – Road House at Barnes and Noble

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DC Motley Full-Zip Hooded Sweatshirt – Men’s

DC Motley Full-Zip Hooded Sweatshirt - Men's

DC Motley Full-Zip Hooded Sweatshirt – Men’s The DC Mens Motley Full-Zip Hooded Sweatshirt wont protect you from Nikki Sixx-sized heroin overdoses but it will keep you safe from whack 80s hair-metal style.

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Teen Murder Mystery Game: The Totally Tubular ’80s Murder Mystery (Ages 15+) – Instant Download

Teen Murder Mystery Game: The Totally Tubular '80s Murder Mystery (Ages 15+) - Instant Download

Fer sure! This ‘80s murder mystery party is an entertaining and comical mystery party for 8-12 players, ages 15+. So gather your best ‘80s outfit and get ready to jump into the role of a fun ‘80s character while sleuthing a hilarious murder mystery…’80s style! Oh my gosh, like, gag me with a spoon! Like, this is the most radical 1980s murder mystery party you will ever host! Your friends will, like, think you are so totally tubular if you, like, invite them to this hilarious ‘80s murder mystery party. But like, totally beware of the farting ghost catcher! NEED MORE CHARACTERS? Now available: this game has a 5 character (5 female) expansion pack! Click here! We also offer a murder mystery party prop kit for this mystery party including a Rubik’s cube for the host character, a bent spoon with the appropriate evidence on it, 25ft of Crime Scene Do Not Cross Tape , and white face makeup for the victim – CLICK HERE This is the instant download version of the ‘80s murder mystery party. The ‘80s murder mystery party kit that you can instantly download for this mystery party includes the following items: Murder Mystery Party Host instructions – general and specific for each round Guest instructions A character list with descriptions and costume suggestions 3 rounds of game play – clue cards for each character for each round Name tags for each character Murder Mystery Dinner Menu Suggestions Required as well as optional activities (games) for each round including: Ice-breaking ‘80s Trivia Questions A Totally Tubular ‘80s Dance Contest The Totally Awesome ‘80s Movie Challenge Gag me with Charades Challenge ‘80s Music Lyric Challenge ***ALL OF THIS IN ADDITION TO THE MYSTERY!*** SYNOPSIS: The totally radical CEO of Baqua Net Hairspray was an outrageous scientist by the name of Ivan Pingmold. His tubular wife, Polly Pingmold, was a recovering social outcast and recent lawsuit winner. Polly hosted a celebratory dinner for her husband’s benefit concert – ‘Hair Aid.’ ‘Hair Aid’

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